At Least it Wasn't a Rat

Not everyone has heard this story yet:

I have an irrational fear of rodents
Hamsters, Rats
Gerbils, Chinchillas
Anything small,furry and fast
And three weeks ago, I smelled a smell
A familiar smell, unfortunately.
A dead mouse
(Big Flinn was commissioned to do the deed)
Heres that story:
I batted my eyes long enough that he agreed to help me
(he hates mice as much as I do)
I followed the offending odor to my bathroom
So I had him in there, looking under the tub
And the only flashlight I could find
Was a monkey, whose light was in its mouth,
And
When you held the lever on the tail
It opened the monkey’s mouth to activate the light.
Not only that
The flashlight made monkey sounds too.
I laughed and giggled the entire time.
He wasn’t as amused as I.
Which made it worse
Because it made me silently laugh
And he could feel me shaking while
Leaning around him (because my bathroom is too small for both of us)
holding the light
After no sightings,
I started to vacuum some mouse poo and fur
I had spotted inside my heater
And sure enough, I saw the hind end …….
Dropped the vacuum and screamed
“I found it I found it I found it I found it”
While clutching madly to my chest (involuntary reaction)
He got rid of it for me.
And a hero was born.
Which brings me to …..
Tuesday morning, I hit snooze for the last time at 7
Stumbled into the bathroom,
(sorry for the details,,,, but integral part of the story)
I was sitting down having my obligatory pee
And my eyes were drawn to my register
Where I saw
A
DEAD
MOUSE!!!!!!!!!!
3 inches away from where the last one was found
Again, clutching my chest
Saying ohmygoodnessohmygoodnessohmygoodness
(I couldn’t stepped on that stupid thing)
I sat frozen trying to calm myself down
Quickly showered (having intermittent spasms of fear/disgust)
Got ready for work
REFUSED to go back in the bathroom to brush my teeth
So was 15 minutes late for work because I had to go to
Shoppers Drug Mart to get toothbrush and paste
I called my landlord from work
Ted, (who turned 77 years old that week)
And begggggged him to go down and get rid of it.
He proceeded to tell me that he know JUST where
They were coming from.
He’d put out poison along with Corn Niblets
Near a hole that was directly above my bathroom …….
We agreed that that might not be the optimal solution ….
Now I peer around the corner of my bathroom every morning to
Make sure I have no visitors
Dead or alive