Good Riddance 2009

AN OPEN LETTER TO 2009

Dear 2009:

Don't take it personally, but you weren't really that kind to me and I'm prettt-y happy you're leaving tonight. You brought me greatness in all kinds of ways; wonderful experiences, lots of laughs and great new adventures. But you also brought me a whole lotta crap.

You tended to be tempermental and brought unpredicable winds of uncertainty and fear. You surprised me sometimes with little sunbursts of greatness and unimaginable wonder. Your good and bad, on paper, equal each other, but in reality, the good far outweighed the terrible. I've learned how to live on faith, how to lean into my family for support, and how to be vulnerable without being judged. Because of you, I've had to dig deep, be honest to myself and be real and be okay with my brokenness.

I guess I should thank you for showing the lows, of which I'd never thought I'd come out of, so I could know the real highs when they arrived and realize I deserved them.

I should also thank you for the absolute crap you threw my way, the days my world was crashing down around me, so I could fully appreciate that I was truly and fully loved while my family and new friends rallied around me.

I will also, with a full heart, thank you for the Seed. It has changed my world and has introduced me to the most sincere, authentic people I have ever met. It has shown me a side of life I hope to never know personally and that I had no idea existed to this extent. And that somewhere, somehow I can make a difference, be hope for someone besides wallowing in my own imperfect life.

Can you do me a favor, and pass the message along to Twenty -Ten that I'd prefer a quieter ride this time? I'd like more good this year, less of the drama, chaos and theatrics ?? While I appreciate your efforts to keep things interesting, can we just turn down the volume a notch this year? My request is less talk, more action. You know, show me the goods, don't just dangle them in front of me? Can you let me prove to myself that I'm not a complete flake who can't keep a job or man? I don't necessarily care what others think, but I'd like the chance for me, myself, Leanne to feel like I'm not a failure. I'm doing my part, can you please do yours?? I think you owe it to me.

I'm just sayin' !