Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Dream Weavin' (read : ridiculous mix of tv too soon before bed)

So Wills and Kate were in town (town unrecognizable) and she decided she was going to ditch hubby for the day and hang out with Heidi and I. So we went to a pub and we're chilling out, laughing, talking , you know, the things you do with a princess in a pub. Word was getting out that she was around and the place was starting to fill up but I had to run home for something.

I was rushing because I had to get back to hang out with my new BFF before the crowd got to be too much.

On my way back through my neighbourhood (neighbourhood also unrecognizable) I, along with the rest of the crowd, lets say about a dozen, were taken hostage by an Asian military. I was laying on the ground thinking 'Great, now I'm going to miss hanging out with Kate. And the bouncers aren't going to let me in because they won't believe that I was already there with her".

Then I looked up and saw the soliders and thought (still dreaming) 'well, thats just ridiculous, this has to be a dream, I'm Canadian, this doesn't happen in Canada'.

AND I WOKE UP!!!

I woke up because the thought of being taken down by a foreign military wasn't realistic.

But .... hanging out in public with the Duchess of Cornwall is ...

Oh man - glad my subconscious world stays sub, and doesn't surface to conscious.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Trying To Sneak One By Me Fail

With strange rules at camp (thats a different post for a different day) like "you can't bring food from the dining hall out", I asked a co-worker this am if he'd nip a banana for me and put it in his coat since the Bag Up Room (where we pack a lunch for the day) was out by the time I'd gotten there. He complied and brought back two which were sweetly, perfectly ripe. I smiled in contentment at the vision of chunky peices of banana goodness in my gluten free Chex and rice milk at precisely 10:15. A yummy distraction from big ugly worky stuff.

At about 720, he appears in the door of my office. I light up. YES! My bananas are here (stolen waters are sweeter, no?) In his scottish accent, he says "Heres your bananas love". "Thanks!" I enthuse but do a double take when I see the fruit which previously was attached nicely at the stem was now seperated and one was conspicuously replaced by a much older, much less appealing, on-its-way-to-the-banana-bread-factory substitute.

I repeat my thanks looking up at him half expecting him to explain the mysterious switch. But, alas, he just looked at me with a glint in his eye and a secret look confirming our little heist had gone off without a hitch.

I wonder if he actually thinks I'm stoopid ....

Aussies, Scots, Brits, Indian, Asian, Capers, Newfies

I work in a global industry which becomes a melting pot of cultures.

Who knows what my accent is going to be when I leave here!

Next thing you know, I'll be calling you love or mate !

Stranger Danger

I have several female co-workers but theres three of us who have really bonded. They are roomates in Calgary, and both are hysterical. Tassie is a close clone to Angelina Jolie; exotic (German/Ukranian), 5'10, and hilarious. Sherri is half Asian, 5'3, looks like Lisa Ling and has the same wit as Ellen Page. We laugh so much and so loud and long and obnoxious. Sherri will repeat a conversation she's had with someone word for word with the exact accents and we keel over laughing. And she deadpans; she'll say something side-splitting and keep eating while Tass and I can hardly see we're laughing so hard. And in a few weeks, we're going to have back to back schedules which saddens us all very deeply.

Sooooo ... wading through all that to get to this:

We've started a 'Stranger a Day' initiative since soon we're going to be on our own at various times. We pick a stranger at breakfast or dinner and sit with them, ask them invasive personal questions and completely disrupt their quiet time.

Since we end up at the table at different times, these poor people who were enjoying their meal have no idea what is happening when Angelina, Lisa Ling and myself show up about 30 seconds after each other. Its amusing.

The following are the results of our study:

Lane, a labourer (I think) from somewhere in BC (he and T has struck up a friendship)

Colin- Sydney Mines, Pitt Street to be exact (now we're buds since we know the same people)

Kaye and Mary - Electrician and I'm assuming an Admin from Edmonton (one of them told us death stories, we were depressed living the dining room)

Ian - Ironworker from Barrie, Ont.

Butch - Scaffolder from Cape Breton, cute little guy I had breakfast with one am.

No Name (Maybe Michael) from Scotland - we scared him and he doesn't sit with us anymore. We see him across the room and laugh because our conversation that night truly frightened him.

Liz- Admin from Ottawa area.

Thats all I remember - I'm not as outgoing as the other two (or as young and eager, maybe??) and I may sit with them, but I usually wait until they engage me.

And these people who are unaware that they are an experiment, are now referred to as 'Stranger Ian, etc .. '

I wonder if I'll ever grow up.

Camp Quotes - Part 1

(I've named it Part 1, since I'm fairly certain I'll have several postings)

"it tastes like meat" - co-worker Tassie when asked how her dinner was

"i like your hair. it takes years of your age, its a young woman's hair do" - my boss

"i'm a man of simple needs, Leanne. Change your hair do tomorrow please" - my other boss (4 minutes later)

(for the record - it was curly and pulled into a side pony, my personal opinion is that it was very trendy and cute)

"take 'em all! tomatoes - the devil fruit i call it" - man behind me in dinner line as i was picking out the cherry tomatoes out of the mass of lettuce they managed to call salad.

thats it for now. these are just the ones my goldfish memory retained!

Stories

... boy do I hear some doozies.

Working with men who've been in Oil and Gas globally for 35 years has opened my eyes to the vastness of life that lives beyond the safe confines of the shores of North America.

Singapore. Malaysia. Spain. Brazil. All night time stories. All involving copious amounts of booze.

Regardless of their origin, these stories, along with the story telling talent, has us open-mouthed and howling in laughter.

I think I may be in for the ride of my life up here. I have found myself in direct contact with some very powerful people who are more than willing to help me out with my career choices.

It is good (so far) but remember how over the top excited I was about my last job and how I had sunshine and lollipops coming out my butt as I flew hand in hand (hoof?) with unicorns over fields of sugarplums and chocolate then it went to hell in a handbag in an instant? Well, this time, I'm not setting myself up for that kind of fall - so I'm just chillin', doing my job and not getting emotionally involved. So for now, I really like it, its challenging and not a typical office job and its an amazing opportunity to get ahead in life. So I'm going to continue to do what I'm doing and just get it done!

More to come....

Cheers Mates!

L.

Camp - Again

Its been so very long since I've sat down to blog. Well, its been so very long since I've actually sat down and typed a blog. I've tried plenty, however with fruitless results.

So I'll give you the Readers Digest version of the last couple of months.

- I accepted a really great job with Imperial Oil at Kearl Lake in the oil sands of Northern Alberta. About 10 kms away from the last job I was at up here. But a much, much, better job, and in a different stratosphere as far as living conditions go.

- My job start date was delayed by a month due to the wild fires here. So I booked a flight home to Nova Scotia and had what I can only describe as 'soul-cleansing'. I am truly, truly blessed (pardon the often over-used churchy word) to have been chosen for the family I have and the friends and friends of family who surround me. One of the most relaxing, happy, carefree trips anywhere. Ever.

- So thats basically it - The rest of the posts for the next couple of days are going to be pretty camp-heavy.

Enjoy.

xoL.